if u ever find a genie and you’re really craving a dessert that looks like this:
do NOT say “i’d like a lifetime supply of raspberry crowns”
while this is, in fact, the name of the pastry, it’s ALSO the name of a species of wasp for some reason. the genie, being a nasty trickster, will no doubt give you a bunch of wasps.
I was baking a strawberry shortcake for my mom when I realized that I forgot the baking powder. I began to panic so I pulled the cakes out of the oven; they were already completely baked but they rose just fine without the baking powder? I was staring at them in confusion, trying to remember if I accidentally put yeast in the batter, when I felt a shadow loom over me. I looked over my shoulder only to find Luigi. Luigi tenderly took my hands and told me, “You need not worry, for I will accompany you in any and all of your baking endeavors.” I have never felt more loved in my life. I cried.
I thought this was the mother of all shitposts and then I saw the url
absolutely not. does this blog look like it endorses sub-par energy drinks? no. this blog promotes getting spit roasted between two demonic hell beasts after fine dining on that sea monster pussy. miss me with that ain’t even shit drink unless it leads me straight into a monster bukakke scene. can’t even begin to imagine a world where I would rather drink that death syrup as opposed to riding that eldritch horror dick. fuck you.
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